Putting My Father Death In Order - A Life-Altering Journey

For me, losing my father was perhaps one of the most devastating experiences of my life. The sudden absence of someone who has been an integral part of your life can leave you in a state of disbelief, grief, and confusion. As I embarked on my journey of healing, I realized that putting my father's death in order was not only essential for my own well-being, but also an opportunity to celebrate his life in a meaningful way.

Grief is a complicated emotion that manifests differently in each person. Some may experience intense sadness, while others may grapple with anger, guilt, or even numbness. When my father passed away, I found myself in a whirlwind of emotions, desperately searching for a sense of closure and understanding amidst the chaos.

Initially, I tried to bury my emotions, pretending that everything was normal. However, I soon realized that suppressing my grief only intensified the pain. It was crucial for me to acknowledge and confront those emotions head-on, giving myself permission to mourn and grieve in a healthy manner.

The Suicide Index: Putting My Father's Death in Order

by Joan Wickersham(Kindle Edition)

4.5 out of 5

Language	:	English
File size	:	1020 KB
Text-to-Speech	:	Enabled
Screen Reader	:	Supported
Enhanced typesetting	:	Enabled
Word Wise	:	Enabled
Print length	:	331 pages
Lending	:	Enabled

FREE

One of the most effective ways to put my father's death in order was by creating a personal ritual or ceremony to honor his memory. I decided to gather close family and friends for a memorial service where we could share our fondest memories and celebrate his life. This process allowed me to bring closure not only to myself, but also to those who were affected by his loss.

Another significant step in my healing process was sorting and organizing my father's belongings. Going through his personal items was both heartbreaking and cathartic. It provided me with an opportunity to reminisce about the moments we shared and reconcile my emotions with his physical presence.

As I sorted through his clothes, awards, and handwritten letters, I discovered hidden treasures that shed light on his life, passions, and accomplishments. Untangling the threads of his existence, both past and present, helped me comprehend the impact he had on the world and the legacy he left behind.

While grieving, I found solace in writing about my father and the profound effect he had on my life. Journaling became my sanctuary, allowing me to express my thoughts, fears, and the immense love I still held for him. Sharing these personal reflections with others who might be going through a similar journey not only provided them comfort, but also strengthened my own healing process.

Furthermore, seeking professional help played a pivotal role in putting my father's death in order. Grief counseling allowed me to navigate through the complex emotions and learn coping mechanisms to cope with grief. Therapy sessions helped me gain invaluable insights into my own grief journey, enabling me to accept and process the loss in a healthier manner.

As time went on, I realized that putting my father's death in order didn't mean forgetting him or moving on; rather, it meant finding a way to integrate his absence into my life. I began incorporating his memory into my daily routines, dedicating a special space in my home for his photographs and belongings.

Engaging in activities that my father loved also became a source of comfort and remembrance. Whether it was playing his favorite music, visiting places he cherished, or even pursuing a hobby he enjoyed, these acts allowed me to feel connected to him and honor his memory.

This journey of putting my father's death in order was never an easy one. It required immense strength and resilience to face my emotions and confront the depth of my grief. However, in the process, I discovered the transformative power of embracing loss and using it as a catalyst for personal growth.

Today, as I reflect on my own journey, I am compelled to share my experiences with others who may be struggling with the loss of a loved one. My hope is that by sharing my story, I can inspire and encourage others to embark on their own healing journeys, finding solace, understanding, and a renewed sense of purpose.

Putting my father's death in order was not a one-time event, but an ongoing process of acceptance and remembrance. It allowed me to cherish the memories we shared, honor his impact on my life, and ultimately find peace within myself. Losing a loved one is never easy, but by putting their death in order, we can transform our grief into a celebration of life and love.

The Suicide Index: Putting My Father's Death in Order

by Joan Wickersham(Kindle Edition)

4.5 out of 5

Language	:	English
File size	:	1020 KB
Text-to-Speech	:	Enabled
Screen Reader	:	Supported
Enhanced typesetting	:	Enabled
Word Wise	:	Enabled
Print length	:	331 pages
Lending	:	Enabled

FREE

National Book Award Finalist: “Wickersham has journeyed into the dark underworld inside her father and herself and emerged with a powerful, gripping story.” —The Boston Globe
 
One winter morning in 1991, Joan Wickersham’s father shot himself in the head. The father she loved would never have killed himself, and yet he had. His death made a mystery of his entire life. Who was he? Why did he do it? And what was the impact of his death on the people who loved him? Using an index—the most formal and orderly of structures—Wickersham explores this chaotic and incomprehensible reality. Every bit of family history, every encounter with friends, doctors, and other survivors, exposes another facet of elusive truth. Dark, funny, sad, and gripping, at once a philosophical and a deeply personal exploration, The Suicide Index is, finally, a daughter’s anguished, loving elegy to her father.